Alignment to Tangible Success with Dan Mangena

Today’s Guest

After receiving a late diagnosis of Asperger’s and experiencing what can only be described as life-shattering trauma at the age of just 20, Daniel spent the next seven years struggling to keep these revelations and events from spilling into every area of his life. As a result of his struggles, Daniel built a simple, four-step system called the Beyond Intention Paradigm.

Initially built as a lifeline grappling with suicidal thoughts, Beyond Intention was born, transforming Daniel’s life from misery to celebration. Through his own struggles, Daniel found a path to lasting joy and purpose and he wants nothing more than to share the tools that saved his life. To that end, he lives by this mission statement:

“Spearhead an evolutionary uplift in universal consciousness by awakening people to the importance of their unique role. This that is already encoded in them by way of a deep and often ignored or undervalued passion defined as their Dream.”

Through motivational speech, Daniel shares his vision of empowerment and joy, as well as via books he has authored, his “Do it With Dan” podcast series (which is available on all major platforms), frequent blogging, articles, and a series of worldwide workshops. Recently listed in the Wall Street Journal as a “Master of Success”, Daniel also offers coaching and consultations in groups and in one-on-one sessions. Each of these sessions honors his mission and helps his clients abundantly find meaning and joy in their lives.

RESOURCES

www.dreamwithdan.com/hmm

episode transcription

Heather Clark 

Welcome to Unshakable Being: inspiration and practical tools for purpose led helpers, guides and leaders like you to shift out of stress, stop going in circles, and get what you want in your life body in business. I am Dr. Heather Clark, and I’ll be your host.

Heather Clark 

Hello and welcome to Unshakable Being. Today we have on the show Daniel Mangena. He is someone who is fan freaking tastic. He does all sorts of different things. He has developed the Beyond Intention paradigm, which I’m hoping we can find out all about today. He is an author, a speaker and a coach who shares his vision of empowerment joy via motivational speaking, his books including the recent book, Money Game, his podcast series, Do It With Dan, blogs, articles, coaching and worldwide workshops. Dan was also recently listed in the Wall Street Journal as a Master of Success. Dan, welcome to the show.

Daniel Mangena 

Thank you for having me. Listening to all of that backup like I like this guy want to meet him. Let’s go for some hot chocolate some time.

Heather Clark 

Take him out for coffee. So, Dan, I’m so glad that you’re here.

Daniel Mangena 

Thanks for having me. I’m just it was really, like I said we were speaking before this is my manifestation game by to be on the show really, really, really happy to be here.

Heather Clark 

Fabulous. There’s so much I want to know. First I think I want to start with tell us a little bit more about the Beyond Intention paradigm

Daniel Mangena 

And let me regale the tales of the beginning of Beyond Intention…

Daniel Mangena 

So essentially it was me trying to work out what had gone wrong with my life. Okay, and I got a lot of success when I was young, made my first million by the age of 20, promptly lost all that within a year and then went ahead and built up a multimillion pound fortune, lost it all by the age of 24. And up until that time, I was employing skills that I learned. I mean, I’ve been in personal development, since I was about 16, when I probably started reading about mindset and visualization, and all this kind of groovy stuff, and I put together a model that was called Vision, Purpose, Fate, Gratitude.

Daniel Mangena 

And that was a model that I do successfully for a couple of times of creating a really, really lovely life for myself. But after the second time of losing everything, I kind of had to come to terms with the fact that something was wrong. There’s a kink in the system here, bro. And Beyond Intention is what came from the next 12 years of identifying what was wrong and going on a deeper journey into myself, which I think was a big part of the missing piece from before. A big journey into the heart and bigger journey into service. And the result has been Beyond Intention, which is four steps of it, Accept, Clear, Gratitude, and Listen to create pretty much anything we want in our lives.

Heather Clark 

We are going to get along famously, I’ll tell you that right now.

Daniel Mangena 

It will make this really less awkward that we get along good.

Heather Clark 

So tell me about how people can really begin to apply some of these things. I mean, flesh this out just a smidge more without giving away all of your secrets, obviously, have like, where does the rubber meet the road? And how can we take this and go got it. Let’s do it.

Daniel Mangena 

Fabulous. So a big part of where Beyond Intention came from was as I continued my journey, and was going on this real I mean, the distress that I found Everything gone completely wrong when I come to the place where I was actively trying to commit suicide. But the only reason why I didn’t in the face of my failures was I didn’t want to fail at something else. That’s literally the thought that stopped me going through with committing suicide that I didn’t have a surefire way to commit suicide. And if I failed, then I will fail at something else. And then it would look like, Oh, look, you know, he’s attention seeking, or all of these stories are going on for me. And so when it clicked, when it dawned on me that the only way that I’m going to successfully end my own life is if I take responsibility for learning how to, and the thought that the seeds have the thought that hang on a minute.

Daniel Mangena 

I am the only one that’s going to be able to do that.

Daniel Mangena 

And the first thought that became the first step of Beyond Intention was, I’m the common denominator. In this experience, and every experience I’m running away from and starting to build on that led to the first step of Beyond Intention. And then the next step clear came in, when I started to understand about more about energy and how it ties into what I was doing. And as I studied more about these very esoteric ideas of the mind and thought and beliefs and what had gone wrong, because before, what was my greatest strength, but also was my greatest downfall with this complete ignorance of me not being able to do anything. I literally didn’t believe that there was anything I couldn’t do. But where that became a bit of a problem for a 19 year old running around the world was that it meant that I didn’t get the right counsel. I didn’t get the right support and mentorship and the right assistance, because I arrogantly believed that I could do anything.

Daniel Mangena 

And so when I started to come to the to get more help and to dig into that to unpack it. I started to find what I like to call fluffy poetry, kind of like the popcorn spirituality stuff like oh, you know, be in the now and reflect on your feelings and you know, and stuff that I mean, I’ve got Asperger’s. So I need things to be very tangible. One plus one equals two, binary one and zero in order for me to make sense of it, otherwise, I can’t do anything with it. So where Beyond Intention started wasn’t for me giving it to other people. It was just for me having model to take this really great information, stuff I could see could work and making it practical giving it space to actually give me a real result.

Daniel Mangena 

And so one of the key components of that and it’s something that underpins everything Beyond Intention being applied. And everything I do is teaching people manifestation of money and anything else is the idea of enlightenment. Because the piece that really started to click everything together, was the notion that if I meditate, for example, and I am able to really connect to a beautiful space within my heart, that’s great. But if I open my eyes, I’m no longer in the-I’m not in a reality that speaks about being in the heart. In my three dimensional world, where I’ve got my senses where there are bills to pay, there are people to engage with, there’s a body that needs to be fed.

Daniel Mangena 

So there’s this disconnect between the space of spirit or the realm of energy and my physical realm where I live. And it’s the same thing when I have a beautiful visualization I I connect with the image of my future, you know, I really envision it like Neville Goddard talks about and, you know, I’m really connecting it, I’m employing my imagination. I’m really believing it and then open my eyes and I still got bills to pay. I’m still in the deadbeat relationship. My boss treats me like poop. My kid’s hate me. I’ve still got this. So there’s these pieces all need to be brought together. And it was understanding that we can actually choose to have all of these pieces clicking into place and lined up with the outcome that we want. And using Beyond Intention to make that choice at every level, that we can manifest absolutely anything.

Heather Clark 

What is not to love about that? I really appreciate you sharing about how you get the esoteric and you can swim in those waters. And that’s all fine. But based on your wiring, or at least that’s how I see it based on your wiring. Like it needs a tangible. Is it a tangible application or a tangible way of understanding it?

Daniel Mangena 

I think it just needs to be real. And I think it’s not just people like me whose brains work differently. I think what I found in my work, and it’s, I believe, knock on wood continues. The reason my work has the success rate that it does with people is because we all need it. It’s just we don’t all acknowledge we need it. And the need of it isn’t so evident in our day to day life. So for example, I literally would be stuck, even doing my standard grocery shopping without that really tangible ones and zeros. One plus one equals two, I would not be able to function without it. Other people don’t have that in your face. Evidence of the need for that. tangibility. And so they kind of float through life, going to another program, reading another book, doing the latest Gabrielle Bernstein, live stream or whatever, and not getting any results from it. Because they didn’t know that they didn’t have that connection to the physical. So they just stay in the esoteric. They meditate everyday.

Daniel Mangena 

 I’ve got one woman I’ve worked with she spent 52 years in spiritual practice, you learn at the feet of Baba Ram Dass, and yet she wasn’t completely happy with her life, completely happy as in she was on her fifth marriage, which she’s now left, wasn’t financially in a place that she should be for the age that she was at. But she’d spent all these years diligently in spiritual practice diligently feeling good about her life, even in the face of adversity, making her way through trial after trial and succeeding, and yet didn’t have a life that was befitting for someone who had done as much work that she had done on herself. And for her, it was the mental it was the mental piece, and that she’d spent so much time focusing on the spiritual that everything else had been left untouched. And attended.

Daniel Mangena 

And there are those people, for example, it’s been years going to courses going to programs, learning the latest visualization technique or the latest mind hack that they got from a Tony Robbins seminar, they’ve walked on fire. And yet, they’re still not living up to anywhere near their full potential. Maybe it’s because they haven’t understood that they didn’t have clarity in where they were directing that mental power.

Daniel Mangena 

But once you do click those pieces together and understand as I teach in my flow funnel model that a clear vision of what we want a clear idea, clear intention, as I as I put it, with an emotional state, and freedom from energetic bonds of the past and the future, to exercise that emotional state now, a belief in the outcome as being possible for you, and an acknowledgement of the fact that we can only experience what we have first front run with our minds, and then actually living our life not in terms of what we don’t have, but in what in terms of what we are, have a level of certainty that we’re going to create.

Daniel Mangena 

That’s when we get an outcome, every single outcome that we have is because unconsciously, this connection of what we want, what we feel, what we believe and what we do are aligning this as with it. That’s everything that you don’t want that relationship that you don’t want to be in. It’s because on some level of consciousness, there is an unconscious desire that’s pulling you towards outcome. Your emotional state is resonating with it, you believe that it’s possible. And because you think it’s going to happen, that expectation is creating a mental front run of experience. And then your unconscious behavior which is led by your unconscious mind is repeating choices and the recreation of an environment that fosters and allows that outcome to continue.

Daniel Mangena 

But it’s by disrupting all of these things and aligning them to the outcome that we do want that we get a change that reflects what we actually desire to experience.

Heather Clark 

I love this so much. And I want to circle back to things need to be real.

Daniel Mangena 

Yeah.

Heather Clark 

Completely agree with that, completely agree with that and not real from a reductionist materialist standpoint, but real. And I also appreciate that it sounds to me like, you probably are also in the camp of energy is a real thing. Let’s pay attention to it. The physical world is a real thing. Let’s pay attention to it. The mental world is a real thing. And it’s like it’s bringing all parts of you along, and in balance,

Daniel Mangena 

definitely. And then,

Daniel Mangena 

I mean, when I’m working with people, right, I don’t take on many one to one clients, and but when I do work with them on a one to one basis as effectively what we’re doing, we’ve spent the first time the first of our time together, creating the clear vision, and I think popcorn has given us a bad name and create a clear vision for what you want, like people making a vision board. That’s, you know, dude, you’ve been vision boarding for the last few years, maybe that’s not the way for you.

Daniel Mangena 

can write like you’ve been doing visible pies for the last 10 years. You know,

Daniel Mangena 

that’s what I mean by real like you’re doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. So creating the clear vision for me is very, very, we’re not just what do I desire bla bla, now we’re really digging in and getting clear on the details.

Daniel Mangena 

So I had a coaching session with one of the women in my mastermind today, and we’re working on her six figures manifestation. She’s got the five figures now we’re getting it to six. And you know, it’s like, you know, so what are you going to drive when you’re at six figures? Not really sure. Okay, so if you’re not sure how are you going to be able to move towards it? How are you going to be able to adjust your behavior, adjust your thought quality? adjust your your emotional responses to match that experience. There needs to be clarity. Not just I want a blue car. No, what car do you want not just I want a Mercedes what model what makes What color? What extras? Is it gonna be left hand drive or right hand drive.

Daniel Mangena 

I’ll give an example. In my mind movies, which is a tool that I personally use as part of my daily practice. When I moved from the UK, I deleted all the pictures from my mind movie that had a right hand drive, and change them to left hand drive. Now that seems like a very subtle detail. But it’s the subtle details like that, that create the big shift number one, every single picture is first person as in, I’m looking at a scene from my life, not somebody else’s life. Number two, I make sure that the details match the intention I have for my life. And it’s when we do that and start to pull in these little strands that we start to see big shifts.

Heather Clark 

I want to hear more about the detail because I’m a detail person. But what I’ve also noticed is when doing visioning sometimes if I bring in too many details It blows the whole thing up. Like it’s as if nothing works and discovered that that’s, like that’s kind of normal for some people or it’s like, oh, no, you’re missing a piece or Yeah.

Daniel Mangena 

So let’s, let’s jump into the ethers a little bit. So when we’re setting an intention, it’s important for us to focus our energy on the details of the end, not the road. Reason being when we start to focus on the details of the road, what we’re doing is limiting what God the universe divine source can do. Because there is no tyrant out there. It’s a direct response to who we are what we are actually claiming. So when we bind the hands of God and say, Okay, I’m going to be a millionaire only going to make it through real estate. Number one, we cut off all the other potential opportunities. But then number two, we tie ourselves to a single road. And if some level of consciousness we end up getting some traumatic experience to it, if there’s some unconscious belief that we hadn’t uncovered, that disrupts or sabotages our road through real estate. We just completely sabotage our wealth creation efforts. And so the detail is not about the journey, the detail is about the outcome. And we completely surrender everything about the journey itself. That’s where the magic happens.

Heather Clark 

I love that. So it isn’t necessarily about a blue Mercedes with all of these options. It’s more about this is the destination.

Daniel Mangena 

Yes.

Heather Clark 

And a Mercedes is simply a marker of the destination that your brain can really get its hands around, I guess even though brains don’t have hands.

Daniel Mangena 

Because it’s not about the thing. We want the thing for what it does for us. If I want a particular house, I don’t want the house for the house. Maybe I want the house to show people that I’ve got the house because what’s really going on is I’ve got unworthiness issues, that I’m trying to fill in with validation through the seeking of this house. And then I wonder why I get it and I’m not happy.

Daniel Mangena 

I look at the people that I’ve worked with. They’re very, very, very financially successful and they’re empty inside. There’s nothing wrong with money is that their, their motivation for creating it wasn’t grounded in what they truly desire, when they are able to actually connect with what emotionally is the outcome that they were seeking, then they can have that in any any state of being they want the money becomes a tool for them to have more choice for them to be able to enjoy life for them to be able to give back and to help others. But the actual thing behind it was an emotional state. And the physical things just become markers for us to be able to say, oh, here’s what I’ve gotten into, or this is what I’m shooting towards.

Heather Clark 

I love it because I believe that your true desire, that’s a soul signal from the things you want the things you desire, that’s a way that your soul is talking to you. It’s trying to, you know, hey, this is what we really want. And then would you agree that some people kind of misidentify what some of those desires are and that’s part of what takes them off track or it’s like, and what I mean by that is, maybe you want the house And if I’m understanding you correctly, you’re saying it’s you don’t actually want the house you want what the house is doing for you?

Daniel Mangena 

Yes. Because the mind doesn’t understand physically the mind understand if we start talking about the unconscious mind, right? We’re talking about

Daniel Mangena 

a thing that doesn’t understand house, it understands emotions and emotional imprints. So people, for example, that are doing their vision board, and they’ve just got a house on there. But they’ve got no emotional connection to that house, let alone what their house is going to give them. And then wondering why the same house has been on the vision board for the last 10 years. Because the mind doesn’t understand this as a goal as a target. Because it does not understand house, it understands home, it understands security. It understands, feeling worthy. It understands feeling. It understands that the feeling of having your loved ones and being able to nurture and nourish them. That’s what it understands. Does that make sense?

Heather Clark 

That makes sense. perfect sense. Is it more important? So hopefully you’re fine with us drilling down on this? Is it more important? Let’s be using your car example again? Is it about, okay? It’s the blue Mercedes with these options and this and blah, blah, blah, all of that? Would it be just as effective to really get what I would call the energy of that, but the emotional state that having that car would bring the luxury, the freedom, the whatever is, is the emotional state more important, and the car is simply a marker of that? Or is there another factor at play, that the detail for the car is important for?

Daniel Mangena 

Okay, so what we’re really doing is we’re training. So in my work, I take people through different levels. The first level of my work is Beyond Intention. When people have gotten to a place where they’re their master, their ability to choose and to set intentions and follow through with them. Then we move on to the next level, which is something called Alchemic Life Creation. And what our Alchemic Life Creation does, is it understands that in truth, the universe is responding to our, the signal that we put out based on who and what we are in the moment.

Daniel Mangena 

So moment to moment, the world that’s showing up around us is doing so in relation to the energy, literally, the metrical energy that makes up the universe, collapsing and taking shape around the idea of what we think is going to be there. And then we witness that and call it a life. I use the phrase that reality wraps around how we feel. But when we’re learning to actually master the ability to deliberately choose, it’s important to build that muscle with as much practice as possible. And when I invite people to create more detail around what they’re intending, what we’re doing is we’re giving you the ability to have a really clear, easy target to move towards, so that you’re practiced in recognizing that when I set an intention, it happens. Now, once you do that, and you build a momentum when you’re the kind of person that sets an intention and manifests it, when I then say to you, Okay, the next thing that we’re doing isn’t sitting intentions about physical things. We’re saying your intentions about our emotional state and holding that, and then completely riding the wave on anything that shows up in life around that and enjoying that as the adventure of life, then we’re into a different level of work. But to begin, we start with things that we can taste, feel, touch and see include as much of our senses into so that as that muscle builds, we can then take it and apply it to the real work, which is our emotional state, our vibration, our frequency, however you want to call that, that cake.

Heather Clark 

Beautiful and and thanks for laying that out because that I was collapsing that but now that I understand it’s in two steps. I’m completely on board. Makes perfect sense now.

Daniel Mangena 

This stuff is just stuff. All right. And it’s really funny because some people that sit on the other aisle will say, oh, money’s not important, you know, people that go to material things. They’re just definitely just that, but you’ve got to pay the bills. So you do need money. So I often find that people that say that is because they either don’t have money. They don’t have the capacity to create money. So they create all these stories to validate the fact that they don’t have any, right.

Daniel Mangena 

But if we look at the fact of the reality that we live in the collective agreement is that medium is the easiest mode of exchange. So if you want to express yourself and to have more choice in the world as it is today, and this could change tomorrow, the new world could appear tomorrow. But in the world we’re in now, money is the medium through which we can exercise more choice. But it’s not the money that really matters. It’s who we are, with the money or even without it that really matters. But in order to be able to exercise more choice, we work on creating the money that allows us to have more choice, if that makes sense.

Heather Clark 

Yeah, it makes perfect sense. It’s just Well, it’s gonna be kind of obvious when I say that out loud. But money is essentially just the currency but really, it’s about the choice and for many people, it’s the freedom it’s kind of represents what role would you say? Judgment plays in this whole process,

Daniel Mangena 

judgment of people, places and things.

Heather Clark 

Judgment, it’s one of those intentionally vague questions…

Daniel Mangena 

Choosing

Heather Clark 

Yeah, or judgment, let me get a little bit more specific. So for example, people that think, well, money isn’t important. And I agree with you either for your examples, but I also think that there’s some judgment about it, like, it’s bad and wrong to have money, or somehow rich people are bad, but yet you’ve got this drive to have money. And in my frame of reference, that to me feels like a judgment. And I wonder how that plays into your structures? Or if you see that differently.

Daniel Mangena 

I’m with you now. So I talked about something in my work called energy traps. And what energy traps are anything that pulled us out of the now I’ll have to explain a little bit about step two Beyond Intention for that to make more more sense. So what step two Beyond Intention does is it recognizes the fact that time is a construct I thought was really cool meme on I think it was on Instagram the other day, I think I posted it to my Facebook group that really time is what we’ve done to say what happens when the Earth moves around the sun and spins on its axis a little bit. Every bit that moves around, we put a number on it and said, Oh, this is time this is a construct, right? So really, the only thing that’s real in terms of the reality of reality is the present moment.

Daniel Mangena 

And Eckhart Tolle in his work in the Power of Now is what really brought that home for me. And in fact, that book was one of the principal reasons why I constructed Beyond Intention because I wanted to get into the now and to use it effectively. But he just has just been the present moment and if you’re in the present moment, then everything is okay. But then think about how to be in the present moment. All right, thanks, bro.

Daniel Mangena 

So for me energy traps are anything that pulls us out of the now generally speaking that falls into two categories. Some kind of trauma, whether intense or a little less intense that pulls us into the past, or some level of anxiety around the future. We also have what I call positive energy traps, me thinking, and I speak about this in my books that can be an intentional use an example of this, me thinking gleefully about the past, instead of me being present, or me being so excited about the future that I’m not actually present enough to act in the now. Because moment to moment where we’re passing through, and now that gives us the space to direct our future. But if we’re so caught up in the past, in the future, that we’re not present enough, then we end up not being able to consciously step into the process of choosing what we’re going to have here, and therefore what we’re going to experience going forward.

Daniel Mangena 

Judgment for me is one of those traps shame is another one. Guilt, blame. All of these things are energetic, vampires that suck our energy and keep us captive to a space that is not now And therefore we cannot create. Some of them, I think are what I call them. Cover ups. So I think judgment generally speaking is a cover up. It’s like homophobia. I genuinely believe that the most homophobic people are probably got some kind of confusion or discomfort with their own sexuality that they’re not prepared to face. That’s a personal opinion, people might disagree, but that’s what I think. When we start talking about the idea of shame, we’re talking about getting so caught up in other people’s potential judgment, that we’re not able to accept ourselves and therefore we present enough to create what we desire. So I think judgments one of those things where a lot of the time people are dealing with their own demons and projecting them, but in any case, it’s just the choice whether conscious or unconscious, to be in a space that disempowers us from creating from the now.

Heather Clark 

Love it. And it sounds like you have come up with ways that are really very tangible for people because I So read that book by Eckhart Tolle and was like, you know, this is great. Where is my action step? And I call it the just believe, rule of operating like, that doesn’t work for me.

Daniel Mangena 

I don’t think it works for anyone. I think there are people that lie to themselves about and working for them. I mean, one of the funniest things I love, I did this, I think I did tweet or something about this. No, like, I do a lot of my work around abundance now. And it’s like that person who sold you a $997 program, about just meditating to create your abundance, probably used a Facebook ad to do that. So that they means that they actually took some physical action. They’ve got a business machine that they used to tell you that you don’t need to do anything other than sit around and wait for money to fall out the sky.

Daniel Mangena 

And when connect with that, and just realize that three dimensional reality physical reality. In order for something to exist here, it has to be anchored here. I can close my eyes. Now you can close your eyes. Now, any of our beloved listeners can close your eyes now and imagine themselves being a multimillionaire. When they open their eyes, they’re gonna be exactly the way they were. Now, thought is a level it’s a level of reality. And so we can actually enjoy that space. Just like the dream space you can lucid dream, for example, and viscerally experience all of these things. And that’s great. If that’s the only space you want it you can close your eyes. Now, imagine you’re with your soulmate and having the most beautiful relationship and everything’s wonderful. But when you open your eyes, you’re still going to be single or in a disempowering relationship, there has to be a bridge over and the biggest lie that I think people are sold in personal development in spirituality, all this stuff right now, is that it doesn’t require a physical action to anchor it in your physical reality. Even if we’re receiving it

Heather Clark 

Yeah, I think though it’s very important to close your eyes and imagine it because it puts you in the emotional space you get to flesh out well, what is it? I really want about it, but yeah, like and and then what?

Daniel Mangena 

It’s part of the process but part of the process.

Heather Clark 

Exactly. Um, from my own personal point of view, I, I don’t want to make the people wrong, that are making lots of money off of telling people to essentially just believe

Daniel Mangena 

I do. I want to make them wrong. However, it’s my life’s mission to make the wrong I’m sorry.

Daniel Mangena 

I’ve got I’ve got a hashtag. I’m actually going to be all the while when COVID finishes go back up to do an event at the East West bookstore about this call, stop meditating.

Daniel Mangena 

Having a spiritual practice is ruining your life. I’m gonna I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna do it. Someone wrote an article about me think was a medium around the same thing. This is my mission. I want this to stop this must end. Stop taking people’s money and lying to them. I just think it’s horrible. Sorry.

Heather Clark 

No, don’t don’t apologize. I’m trying to not make people wrong. I’m not subscribed to their way of thinking like, that’s an interesting point of view. Okay, great. But at least from my point of view, recently, I’ve been looking at things through the lens of the drama triangle. And, yeah, so I’m sure you’re familiar for people who haven’t who aren’t completely up on it. It’s, it’s a triangle flat at the top. The point at the bottom is the victim role. One of the corners is the rescuer hero, and the other one is the persecutor or villain.

Heather Clark 

So from my frame of reference, this is really effective. When you sell people the just believe School of thinking, this is really effective to help keep people on the drama triangle. And essentially, you’re milking dysfunction to make your money. And because there’s something really attractive, like, Oh, I could somehow get everything I want, without first having to take responsibility for anything. And at least in my own work, it’s when I realized, Oh, crap that isn’t working like that. This is all this is all bullshit, and no. And where am I needing to take responsibility? What’s, what’s going on here? And that’s what I’ve seen with clients as well. When they really turn the corner and start to get what they want. They’ve taken responsibility for these sorts of things. And I’m guessing that your experience is very similar. And you’ve got kind of just simply a different approach.

Daniel Mangena 

All Yeah, I mean, for me, I say truth just is truth is Is there anything new under the sun? Yeah, no, but it’s packaged in a different way. I mean, when you look at any of my work, you’re gonna see aspects of this aspects of that. All I’ve done is I’ve taken existing truth and found a different way to package it. I speak a lot about the importance of intention, the power of alignment, but the aspects that gave me that are practicing truth, you’ve taken the the drama triangle, for example. And you’ve seen a way to align that to the fact that people could be more empowered if they step out of the triangle and actually take responsibility for themselves. And for me, it’s all speaking to the same thing, which is, we are the author and creators of our life. And until we’re ready to accept that mantle will continue running on the treadmill of our life as it is now.

Heather Clark 

Exactly, it’s it’s both wonderful and terrifying to realize at first, I’m the powerful creator of my own experience. Yeah.

Daniel Mangena 

I mean, I said, as I said before, I don’t really take on many one to one clients at the moment. There are really two ways if someone’s in one of my groups and you know, I see that they’re ready to step up, then, you know, I’m happy to step in with them or people can come to my coaching weekend. And I say anybody can come, I still have a conversation with them to see if they’re at least willing to step into space, because I had one experience last year. That kind of shook me for six, watching someone spend, you know, two and a half months with me, really making win after win after win and really making all this progress, giving me great views and saying everything was wonderful, hitting their edge, and then going completely the other way because they weren’t ready to accept responsibility. I wanted to then blame after all of that progress. And I took a pause after that I didn’t take any clients on for about four months after that, just to sort of see what was inside of me that was sort of bringing up that pattern. But since then, I’ve been very, very, I’ve been even more strict than I was before, about only working with people that in the very least, are ready to accept that everything in their life regardless of what it is on some level of consciousness. They have to take some responsibility even if not for the thing, because there are some things that happen to us as children, for example, that, you know, we weren’t in a space to do that. But we have a responsibility now to take responsibility for a responsibility for how we deal with it, or how we move through our lives as a result of that.

Heather Clark 

Yeah, it’s it’s your own responsibility, whether you take it or not, it’s still it’s sort of like not making a decision is making a decision. I love it. And I really appreciate that you were willing to pause and take some time to do your own work. Like oh, this popped up in my life. This is because I’ve had clients blame just from out of the blue I’m like, but no, we, we did everything that we talked about. And like I and I even told you this was likely to happen, you know at month four you go through this and boom, but I really appreciate that. You were willing to just go, okay, timeout. Let me do my own work. Because it sounds like you like me really get that. You don’t have to do that work, but you’re going to get a whole lot more of these problems. If you don’t do it,

Daniel Mangena 

Your choice. One of them works. One of them doesn’t. I mean, look at how I serve in my work. Okay, because I’m a, I’m a very, very, very, very, pretty literal all in proponent of hologram theory. So my, my concept, the concept of reality that I follow is that my world is literally a holographic reflection of what’s happening inside of me, overlaying with other people’s holographic reflections also happening inside of them in what I call quantum overlays. So when I experience my life, I’m experiencing a combination of different people’s experiences projecting out and we’ve got this massive co creation of our experiences together. So when I see something come up in someone else, what I’m really seeing is something inside of me matching a projection of someone else and then we’re co-creating an experience. So if I want to change the experience of what I’m witnessing to someone else, I’m not trying to change them. I’m changing me. So when I’m working with a client, I’m actually doing self work for them reflecting my witness in their life too.

Heather Clark 

And that’s the key to it. Truly, that’s the key to it. And that’s the way to really create the life that you want. And to shift the people around you without actually shifting the people around you.

Daniel Mangena 

Yeah

Heather Clark 

like if something shows up and it irritates you. Great. Go with it.

Daniel Mangena 

Exactly. And that’s really, I mean, that’s, you know, there’s some crappy stuff that happens. And then we have to accept Oh, gosh, so there’s some crappy stuff happening here. I did a Instagram and igtv video about this month and a half ago, saying, you know, because I talked about shadows, mirrors and reflections, which is, the things are showing us aren’t necessarily who we are. It might be the opposite. It might be a direct reflection that we’re not ready to look at, it might be aspects of ourself that we’re suppressing or trying to run away from. Anything that we’re giving life through energy with a four, by attracting or repelling is going to show up in other people in some way, shape, or form. And we don’t always like the idea of that, you know.

Daniel Mangena 

We’ve got a lot of crazy stuff happening in the world now of racial tension. And people like, well, I don’t like the fact that this is happening, you know, it’s happening inside of me. Well, actually, when we look at racial tension, what’s happening is fear, divisiveness, and hate. And when we start realizing that they’re parts of us a civil war of ourselves, of course, we’re going to contribute to the collective agreement of people at war with each other, because we’re reflecting what’s happening inside of us. So it’s not one, it’s not always an easy journey. But when we can come to a place of accepting more and more of ourselves, that’s when we can start having more more magic in our lives and living more abundant, joyful, purpose driven lives.

Heather Clark 

And who doesn’t like more magic in their life, I  mean really? For real

Daniel Mangena 

magic

Heather Clark 

Sign me up. So I want to ask about just diving into that a little bit. Would you agree using your example of racial tensions around the world? That it’s really that reflection of fear and other things within you, when you shift that within you? What’s your expectation for the external shift?

Daniel Mangena 

So this is where we start to get a bit deeper. And he said about scary deep questions. We’re talking about something I call collective or I call something referred to as collective agreements. Now, when I talk about collective agreements, what I’m saying is something that enough people believe in that is good enough life to kind of take on a life of its own. And we’re talking about something dualism is a persistent ugly truth. I think when people actually think about it, there’s pretty much generally always been as far as we’ve recorded as humans, a strong and a weak, a big and a small, a this and a that, a them and an us.

Daniel Mangena 

it’s something that’s always always been there. what’s actually happened over time more is that the separation between the thems and the us’s has become more dark and sinister, in its viewpoint. So when we’re talking about, for example, racial tension, this is hundreds of years of divisiveness, supported by ignorance, supported by manipulation for personal gain, supported by a lack of information, segregation and the fear based things that come on the back of that. I mean, when you look at the Hyksos invasion of Egypt, for example, and everything that came from that, when you look at when Europeans first started moving over to to the Far East, I think it was, I think Alexander the Great was one of the first to go off and do that. And that, that the fear of the unknown that was behind the wall too,

Daniel Mangena 

these Underlying energies, these underlying thought qualities have polluted much of society. And so it’s going to take more of us going within adjusting that thought quality, to be one of love. And then holding ourselves and those around us accountable to that standard, that’s going to create the tipping point of change. That’s my personal belief. When I look at the way that racial tension is being dealt with now, I see that hate is being met with hate in a lot of instances. I’ve had people angry with me because my stance doesn’t match the aggressive. Want to tear everything down formula. There are those that saying it’s all fake, and it’s not real because it doesn’t really affect them.

Daniel Mangena 

But rather than getting caught up in other people, places and things, if more and more of us, go inside and make that change, like take real stock of what was going on inside of it, make that change within and as I said hold ourselves and those around us to that standard, then we’ll start to create these little pockets of expansive energy, that will create the tipping point. But until that happens, nothing’s going to change. Maybe they’re going to start saying that different racial groups are going to start treated the same that are raising their voice now, but there are still smaller racial groups, look at the Kurds in Iraq. Look at the what’s happening in southern Sudan, Southern Sudan, in Yemen. All of this is still continuing. And that’s still oppression that’s happening on account of creed, race, religion, it’s still happening. It’s just that they haven’t had their time to speak their voice but the energy still there is small pockets as well as in big pockets too

Heather Clark 

what type of approach would you recommend once someone has gone within and done their own work, holding yourself accountable? What approach to help hold other people accountable.

Daniel Mangena 

I’ll give you an example. So I’m

Daniel Mangena 

And I’m not speaking here from a political standpoint, saying that everyone should believe this or some believe that. Just there was a friend of mine. He’s African American. And he he had a colleague that he’d worked with. And that colleague that he worked with, posted on social media in response to something around I think it was to do with the riots can’t quote me. But his he made a joke. Black Lives splatter laughing Oh, oh,

Heather Clark 

wow. Yeah.

Daniel Mangena 

So what then happened was, was that other people, Anglo Americans, who know this particular chap, took screenshots shared it and said, This is disgusting behavior. I refuse to be associated with the person that thinks and acts like this. If this is what you believe, then you’re no friend of mine, and it started a tidal wave of people, you know, holding this person accountable for whether they believe it or not, wasn’t really that Nice a joke to make, it’s just not really a nice joke to me. I get the human factor. And perhaps if I wasn’t black, maybe I would have laughed at it

Daniel Mangena 

and I know it’s quite witty. But the fact of the matter is, is that it’s not really nice because there are people that are actually in their pain bodies and are suffering from oppression right now, not all black people associate with that stance. There’s a big thing right now that there’s a load of African Americans or a load of there are some African Americans that are protesting that they’re being referred to as oppressed when they don’t feel oppressed. And that’s great. But there are some people who are suffering right now. Not necessarily all but some. So that’s not very sensitive, but people are holding him accountable to the kind of humor that he’s expressing in a time when it especially not really that sensitive to be able to do so.

Heather Clark 

No, No.

Daniel Mangena 

What we, what we’re allowing to be said around us,

Daniel Mangena 

we are encouraging by our silence And also by our participation is adding to the energy that’s creating ongoing situations happening in the world. And unless we tackle them with direct intervention, and I’m not saying censorship, I’m just saying not accepting, or not allowing it to be acceptable for people to behave in certain ways. Now, is that a judgmental thing? Yes, but there are common collective agreements that we have on human decency. So again, I’m not saying people should think a certain way, or have a particular particular political leaning, or they should necessarily even care about a plight that doesn’t affect them. But just being a decent human being, regardless of whether you are affected by certain protests happening or whether it affects you in any way all you really care about it. It’s still just decent, not to make such a joke about something that’s happening and it’s quite real for many people. So I don’t know if that kind of gives you the direction

Heather Clark 

that does and Okay, so I haven’t, because there’s just nothing about that joke that’s okay. I’m sorry. I like to I pride myself on trying to see things from other perspectives. No, like, that’s not okay. But what I do find it interesting is that people took screenshots and immediately went public with it. Like, I guess my first inclination would be, dude, cut that out

Daniel Mangena 

later, but people were publicly. This is what I found powerful about it that people were publicly stating. This is the kind of person that we don’t want out in the world. This is the combat. This is the example for those of you saying that things aren’t really happening because there’s a lot of people that say, you know, it’s not real and blah, blah, blah. Here’s an example of a real person who we know that’s behaving in a way that’s not decent and acceptable for humans to behave. This is not acceptable. And I’m publicly making the stand that this is my stand for. And this is the kind of person I have in my life. And if you’re that kind of person, then leave my life.

Heather Clark 

No, and I agree with that, I guess from my own perspective, because I tend to just go to the person first like somebody it’s been a couple years ago, made a, like a rape joke, like, No, absolutely not. Somebody else was, it was an in person thing.

Daniel Mangena 

Yeah.

Heather Clark 

And there was just hate speech flying out of their mouth about gay people. And I just involuntarily came down like a ton of bricks, but I just was like, No, but at the same time, it let’s assume that someone jumps right to the screenshot and this is someone who’s doing this and I don’t want to be associated.

Daniel Mangena 

Yeah.

Heather Clark 

What recourse does that person have I almost wonder does that it never before denies them the opportunity. But does it make it more of a mountain for them to go? Oh, my bad. I was, you know, I was thoughtless, or it was a day off or I apologize. Like I’ve got–

Daniel Mangena 

I’ve got my own viewpoints on that I actually did a Facebook Live about this the other day, I think it’s probably on my Facebook page, so you’re not going to change their mind. So I actually don’t give any energy to trying to change somebody’s viewpoint anymore. I live by example, I speak when it’s appropriate. But if I have to hit you over the head with a viewpoint of decent standards of humanity, then that’s just who you are. And you know, bye Felicia, that’s that’s me personally,

Heather Clark 

Me too

Daniel Mangena 

I’m, I’m viciously protective of my energy, and where I direct it, and giving energy that I could be using to create giving present moments I could be filling with joyous energy to create a life for myself and to support those who also want to live groovy lives, versus going on the rampage to tell people that hate is Wrong. I don’t.

Daniel Mangena 

I don’t really?

Heather Clark 

Yeah, yeah, if we’ve got to explain why it’s a good idea to care about other people like i don’t i don’t think maybe I can help you. Yeah. There’s a

Daniel Mangena 

there’s a woman, quite the famous woman in England, when the the protests started in the protests start to turn into riots. And she did a video. And she just said, you know, you people who are doing this, you’re, you’re ignorant. And she did it. three reasons, three questions I’ve got for you. If you can answer these, and I’m going to, I’m going to believe that black lives matter wherever. And she started quoting the figures of black on black crime and all this other stuff. And I was like, Yeah, those figures are right. And this is my personal stance. You know, those figures are right, but we’re not talking about that right now. We’re talking about something else. Let’s table that conversation. You’re correct. This conversation needs to be done. But you’re taking time and airwaves that could be dealt dealing with this particular problem to basically just make ignorant statements or ignorantly timed statements in relation to something else that doesn’t need to be dealt with. But this is what we’re dealing with. Now.

Daniel Mangena 

I wouldn’t bother trying to tell her that she’s wrong because she believes that she’s right.

Heather Clark 

Yeah.

Daniel Mangena 

She’s gone to the effort of I’m going to get into this conversation and say this and say that. Okay, cool. So why am I going to waste energy showing you that that’s, you know, people quite literally fearing for their lives. In some instances. There are parts of America that I won’t go to because I just don’t feel safe. I very rarely drive when I’m in America, I drive as little as possible. Because there’s just I just don’t feel a level of safety for my being right ahead. First, I’ve got borderline first hand experience of some pretty shadowy sides of what happens in some parts of them and other parts of the world too. But I’m not going to take time saying to someone who’s willingly signed up to the Ku Klux Klan, for example, I’d like to talk to you about your feelings about gay people, non Christians and people of color. Let’s discuss where that came from and the trauma that led to this experience and how you can change your state of being.

Daniel Mangena 

My time is for people that want to make a change. People who are innocently ignorant, as I like to call it, and want to actually be educated about different ways to approach for example, race relations, and so on and so forth. Those people I have time for all day long. If hate is what you want, enjoy yourself. I’m just not really giving you bandwidth. Is that

Daniel Mangena 

is that what happened, bro?

Heather Clark 

I love it. Yeah, cuz once you join the KKK We’re done.

Daniel Mangena 

And on that note, I’m out.

Heather Clark 

 I didn’t know I like I’m just gonna cut you out of my life entirely done.

Daniel Mangena 

I mean, I’ve got a story from when I was a teenager so my parents moved to a predominantly white area when I was about 12 no 11 and it was very interesting experience for me because I hadn’t been diagnosed as having Asperger’s, so I had a lot of challenges. Anyway, I was only actually diagnosed when I was 27. So I spent most of my life undiagnosed and being very autistic.

Daniel Mangena 

And so when we moved to my last year of what we call Junior School in England, before I moved into high school, and I had no friends, I was bullied and so on and so forth. And when we moved to high school, I managed to get together a couple of people that could handle my my funny ways, and about four years into high school. I can just go to my friends who you know, I’d slept in their house they slept in mine, they’d eaten my mom’s food. I’ve eaten their mom’s food. And the two of them they nodded to each other as if they kind of prepped for this conversation. They’re very proud of themselves.

Daniel Mangena 

And they said, Dan, didn’t really know any color people before met you. And now I know colored people, all right.

Heather Clark 

Okay, what are you supposed to do with that?

Daniel Mangena 

What are you supposed to do? So basically, it took them four years of kind of half thinking,

Daniel Mangena 

you know, not really having space for and I’ve had this before, I’ve dated people from different cultures as well in the past and been the first black person into their world or into their home even in one instance, which is really interesting when her grandma came down and nearly fell over to find a black man in her front room.

Daniel Mangena 

But it was a opportunities for me personally having the opportunity to to give people a narrative that doesn’t necessarily match what they see in the media, which no Let’s have you right is is, is reinforced by popular culture in many instances too. You look at music video, you look at popular hip hop culture and look at what they do. It could be frightening to someone who comes from a place of ignorance and fear.

Daniel Mangena 

So I get it because I’ve also been on the other side in terms of being the first point of contact for people that have the opportunity to see something different. So because I’ve been a part of that contact, that can facilitate change. I know that there are some people that aren’t deliberately ignorant, they don’t deliberately hate, they’re just going on the basis of what they The only thing they know and they’ve not been given the opportunity to know something different. So those I’m happy to have those conversations, but when someone has had the opportunity, or rejects the opportunity, or just happy where they are, bandwidth goes off, you know, just your accounts been suspended, you no longer have access to consciousness. That’s it.

Heather Clark 

I completely agree with a lot of that, because there are people that were in my life that I’m just like, oh, okay, you’re making other choices and that doesn’t work for me. And then there’s other people that for variety of reasons are still in my life. So it’s kind of like not not wasting the effort. Not. I hate to put it exactly like that. But you know, like, well, education isn’t necessarily what’s required here.

Heather Clark 

But I wonder if some of the issue isn’t what for my frame of reference. One of the bigger stresses in life is when we have a challenge to our identity, or our worldview, which is real similar to the same thing. And I agree with you there are people that Oh, I didn’t know that before. Now I have new information. new way of seeing it new worldview done, check. Moving on, but most people have at least a mini meltdown.

Daniel Mangena 

Mm Hmm

Heather Clark 

Do you think that that’s part of what’s going on with some of these larger things? Or is it deeper and of  a different flavor?

Daniel Mangena 

I think the different combinations, there are some people that that’s what it is. And there are some people that just so tied and this goes back to even, you know what we started our conversation today. So tied in the energy of who they are, that the idea even of moving into the energy of something else just becomes debilitating. They don’t have the bandwidth to make a different choice. They’re just locked instead, the mind is a really powerful thing. And once a certain way of being has been imprinted into it at a deep level, the opportunity to escape that becomes a little more tricky, which I get. There are some instances where people feel tied to a certain way of thinking a way of being.

Daniel Mangena 

If we look at the caste system in India, for example, my friends from that part of the world who are falling in love with people who aren’t in their caste and then just go through what family says whether it’s arranged marriage or whatever, in order to fall in step with their family, because in their value system that takes precedence over their own desires. Or there are some people that will allow friends to say certain jokes, because it’s more important to them to have that friend than the rights of the person who’s offended by that joke, because they’re not going to hear it anyway. So I think it comes down to personal values and the leverage that we have over ourselves, and really who we are a core level and how that expresses in our world.

Heather Clark 

How would you say knowing your own values because I just the way you’re being in the world, I assume that you have a good handle on your own values. How would you say that informs your ability to be unshakable?

Daniel Mangena 

Well, I think we are going to be manifesting. I mean, reality responds, and is a reflection of who we are. Not what we say. Not even what we do. And when who Are we saying what we do is a frivolous, shaky, shaky, intangible, go with the flow, go with, go with whatever the latest weather is, then how are we going to be able to create sustaining changes sustained movement in the direction that we want to be in. If we’re talking about being deliberate on what we manifest, then we have to be unshakable in our commitment to being the state of being that’s going to reflect that. Otherwise, we’re going to revert back to default. We’re going to fall in with the latest fad, or you know, someone’s going to say something and it’s going to throw us off emotionally, we’re not going to be able to sustain a state that’s going to enable us to to, to continue to manifest something that we want. Unshakability for me is an ability to hold fast to what we’ve consciously chosen, until it becomes such a part of our being that unshakable is who we are, and not something that we have to pursue or keep chasing after.

Heather Clark 

I love that. Thank you. I’m also curious, you’ve mentioned a couple of times Asperger’s with a later diagnosis. And I just think that’s a really interesting that you bring it up and it’s in your bio. Um Do you find that that’s helpful to let people know that that’s let me let me back up to feel that that shapes and informs who you are or is that a part of who you are?

Daniel Mangena 

For a while it shaped and informed who I was because there were unconscious behaviors unconscious.

Daniel Mangena 

The results in my life that came from that I didn’t know like I suffered from extreme issues with insomnia for most of my adult life. And I didn’t get when I found out that it’s because I had severe anxiety and social anxiety resulting from the fact that I was living in a world that was speaking a language which I didn’t understand. And that was just not enabling me to function. All that well, when I wasn’t able to see what my gifts were my artistic gifts, and apply those to, to dealing with the challenges, and even just having the ability to know, okay, I need help here, I need help there. So I’ve always got the team around me to deal with day to day stuff. My wife handles a lot of like the little bitty things, because I don’t do well in minutiae detail, I can end up with very, very severe cases of anxiety. So it’s become a part of who I am now. But before because it wasn’t addressing it was it was an unknown. It was really affecting my ability to function and so therefore was dictating who I was.

Heather Clark 

I thought that Yeah, cuz I just thought that was really curious to me, you know, it’s not neither right nor wrong, but to bring it up. And I just didn’t know how that influenced your ability to really be in the world and deal with people and it sounds like If I have this right, if I’ve understood you correctly, the knowledge that that is something that is a piece of who you are, and then structures to deal with it has really helped you be completely unshakable.

Daniel Mangena 

Definitely. I mean, for me, my gifts have been amazing. And I think I actually accidentally ended up creating a lot of coping strategies for me over my life. That meant that a lot of the cost of me having those gifts, I’ve now been able to create structures so that I minimize the impact of those on others. But generally speaking, the gifts that I’ve got outweigh any cost for me personally, and then where it would affect others. I simply Institute frameworks and structures to support that or just basically make sure that I’m upfront from the beginning so that they can have the compassion and patience with me where it’s needed.

Heather Clark 

Well yeah, and allow them to take responsibility for how they’re showing up as well. Like with that new Yeah, you don’t have to, because I’m all about taking responsibility but balanced responsibility. Love this. What else would you like to share? Is there anything else you’d like to talk about that we haven’t really hit on?

Daniel Mangena 

This is been a conversation that’s gone in a direction that I don’t think we thought it was gonna go

Heather Clark 

I know!

Daniel Mangena 

This isn’t what we planned to do one tea. And I think for me, it’s just having people to recognize, I mean, I’ve talked about something called, oh gosh, I’m not going to get into a new conversation. Let’s stick with this. Okay? Just having people take stock of what parts of the puzzle that they’re including in their, that their choices, are they honoring all of themselves, or do they just honor strategy or they’re honoring just their their thought quality, or they just honoring their spiritual practice, recognizing that no one of these things in isolation is going to affect change, and seeking the adequate support and the right tools to include the rest of them as an entire being so that they can actually get results in their life

Heather Clark 

Gorgeous. Dan where can we find you?

Daniel Mangena 

dreamwithdan.com

Heather Clark 

lovely and that, and the other resources will be in the show notes. Thank you so much.

Daniel Mangena 

Thank you for having me. It’s been an absolute joy. I’m just really appreciate you giving me the opportunity to be on the show in any of my listeners, any of my audience, who are tuning into this thank you for supporting this show and be sure to subscribe it, give it a rate, give it a follow, and give it a share.

Heather Clark 

Thank you so much for listening to Unshakeable Being. You’ll find more information in the episode show notes at unshakablebeing.com. Subscribe to the podcast and share with your friends. May you be unshakable, unstoppable and vibrant again. Until next time,